There is a saying in hindi – “Chinta chita ke saman hai, chinta buri bala hai”
“99% of things that we worry about never happen”
Worrying is –
- Not going to solve your problem
- Going to reduce your efficiency–(you are going to make it worse)
- Going to affect your health
What you need is a PLAN
- You should know: What you want to do?
- And the most important aspect which is usually ignored: “How you will do it?”
- Once you know this, you will feel confident…and when you are confident there is nothing to worry about.
- I am telling you this out of experience.It works.Try!!
Career is just a part of your life and not the whole life. If I were to ask you to segregate your life based on the importance of things, the easiest distinction I can share is –
Physical, Emotional, Relationship, business and lastly finance. We are in a culture where the last has become the most significant one. Trust me; you can’t have the last one unless you have the first few. Life is a little cruel that way, it makes you build up a desire about something which makes you forget the rest and at the same time expects you to keep every one of those bits in order to achieve the rest. Maybe for the best or else we would be fixated on only one thing which is of the lowest importance in the scale…
There are a few things you can incorporate to reduce the impact of worry on you.
1) Know that it is OK.. Most people are worried, some say it out loud, most don’t… So you are not alone…
2) identify what the “message worry” is trying to convey.
3) Stop focusing on reasons as to why something cannot work, instead focus on why it can, it creates a whole new perspective altogether.
4) Face your fears, need not be the biggest one but in small incremental levels…
5) be grateful for the worry because it is trying to convey something and try thinking how this worry is trying to help me… Before you know, there are multitudes of answers that pop out and start offering solutions to you…
There are people I know, who really love doing what they do but don’t know why they are always worried about their success or not in their career. The reason may come from their character, they try to be perfectionist and always want everything to be perfect, and when it does not happen the way they want, they very easily fall into a state of fear and anxiety.
I will suggest the same way that I suggested to one of my friends a few years ago. She said she was worried about being posted elsewhere after some time. Perhaps she desired an affirmative reply from me to help her in this respect.
“Do you believe in after-life, being a Muslim?” I asked. She replied affirmatively. “Then include your time to eternity from now on. Your future in the present world will appear much closer. It will be as close as it looks to be and will be a part of the PRESENT. You think about your Present then. Forget about ‘near future’ because it appears part of the present. You are already working at present and your future is being taken care of. SIMPLY DON’T WORRY ABOUT THE LONG JOURNEY AHEAD”.
Believers or non-believers, we can make ourselves feel convinced that our present will take care of our future. THERE MUST BE MANY WAYS THE PROBLEMS WOULD BE SOLVED. THOSE WAYS WILL BE CLEAR AS MORE TIME PASSES. If worries can disturb you, you can undo the pressures through positive thinking.
Trying to analyse yourself, is one of the ways.
People may have social anxiety, I hope I am picturing the state of mind in correct manner
One might be speaking less to the people, one might have less close friends. So one might have an impression from a scenario, that who speaks well and communicates well is successful. May be in schools, colleges, one who communicates well may appear successful.
But in higher positions in very big companies, people who speak less, have successful records.
Being social is no guarantee for better future. I had this feeling at a younger age.
Whatever be the future, if you are smart and ready to handle anything, you are a hero. If you want to handle anything, try to learn and make keen observation on everything you encounter and experience.
Just relax and observe. You will attain all the knowledge of universe.
The knowledge will destroy all your fears.
Live at the moment. You cannot change the past and you need not panic at all about future. Try to do everything in the best manner. Love the people around you and enjoy the moments, do the work at your hand in best manner.
You will be guided then and there by people, so just keep moving on.
You can stop worrying and start dreaming. Dream big. If cost, intelligence and background had no meaning, what would you do with your life? Where would you go?
Then take those dreams, and learn what it takes to make them reality.
Do you need an education in a specific field? What does it cost? What are your skills or talents RIGHT NOW that can help you earn the money to pay for at least some of that education? Are scholarships or residencies in that field available?
What does it cost to go to the places you want to see? To live where you want to live? The cost isn’t only the money.
While it’s not true that anyone can do anything they desire, it is true that most people can do more than they believe that they can. It takes dreams, research, plans, and execution of the plans.
And, because this is real life, the realization that even the best laid plans and the best executed excellent plans won’t always turn out the way we’d thought that they would. But accepting, up front, that there are choices to be made that can impact your future, why worry about it? Plan it, instead.
Worrying about anything to some degree is normal. Worrying too much and worrying about the future is fruitless. It stresses you out and the future you are imagining may not even happen the way you imagine. By worrying about the future, and the past for that matter, you are not living in the now. The now is where your life takes place.
If you are religious think of it this way. Worrying about anything for any great length of time is not trusting God to take care of your future. If you are Buddhist worrying about the future is futile because the future isn’t real and what is there is only in your mind.
I would recommend a book by Dale Carnegie called How to Stop Worrying and Start Living. I found it very helpful for this problem.
Recognize that you future will be better if you base your actions on what is real.
Real is that you have to focus on life, and choose how to use it, or be happy with the sloppy results. That can be controlled by old memories, fears, and fables, or it can be based on what’s true no matter where, when or how. Every human, abides by the same realities. Muslims, Sikhs, Catholics, Baptists, Buddhists, Zarathrustans, Animists, Hindus, Jains, atheists, agnostics, engineers, physicists, laborers, janitors, and Nobel Prize winners, are the same in that aspect. The essential realities of life are inescapable.
It would be better for humans to recognize those realities, and then build each unique person hood upon them.
Real is that we all have common needs, unique needs, and individual perspectives.
Real is that whatever you do makes a difference, even if it is not immediately visible.
Real is that lives change, yet Life goes on.
Whoever is able to keep those reality points in mind, without ignoring any of them, gets the goodies far more often than those who depend on luck, looks, charm, or just hope.
Libraries, bookstores, servers, are bursting with bits of these elements because humans want a way to make life better. Yet, the bits are difficult to use because they are so diffuse, and mixed with the fears, fables, fallacies that already trouble us.
A mental tool that can help us cut though the obstacles to happy success is needed. It has to be focused, and accurate.
The effort to create that tool was concentrated in Asia, while Europe was still setting unworked stones into circles. The learning, and concentrating, took many generations of meditation, teaching, trial, and error. Finally it was done. The wisdom was ready to be finalized.
The Excalibur of Life was forged by a common monk, Nichiren, who distilled the millennial wisdom into six words. What Isaac Newton did for astronomy, and gravity, Nichiren did for all of life.
Those six words contain points 1 To 4, and much more. Knowing, studying, discussing these ideas, and writing about them have some effects on a person’s life. Yet an idea is not the same as an action. To make a deep impact, the ideas have to be put into action.
That begins with giving life to the concentrated wisdom by speaking the words.
That makes it real. It engages neuroplasticity to enable anyone to cut through those fears, fables, fallacies, and use inner powers to build a beautiful life – happy and successful.
Since this process was carried out in a succession of Asian Countries finalizing in Japan, and since the group that teaches it in 192 countries, and territories, is based in Japan, the words are spoken in Japanese.
They are Nam Myoho Renge Kyo.
Do not worry about something that you won’t experience ever. Will you ever see future? No one would.
So, work on your present and make it better in whatever ways you can. One thing will lead to another and everyday will be better than the yesterday!
Stop worrying and start working hard enough on what you are working at right now. I won’t say that your future would be secured that way. If you fail (let’s hope not so), at least you can say that you tried and worked hard.
Worrying about your future will not make it any better.
Set your goals, make plans and work on your plans every day. Live in the moment and you will have a bright future.
But if you keep worrying you will miss both the future and present moment.
Thinking much negative brings much bad luck. The trick is to convert the initial negative idea to positive idea so that you have peace of mind to think of the next plan or action. Like in an exam, if you think the question being asked is very hard to answer go to the next question. People doing this strategy surely get good scores.
Remember, you have a challenging condition, but you may find that there are ways to deal with the challenges. There may be counsellors at university who will help you with your anxiety (if it is severe, medicine might be helpful but it won’t make everything perfect or change you into a superman).
Before worrying about it in the present, wonder if you are going to be alive in the future… So live the present and live your life.
You never know what is going to happen in the next minute, may the ceiling above you just falls.
So CHILL, go with the flow!
Some may advice to turn it over to God. There is no need to worry about your future if you know that God (who is Love) is guiding it. It gives me such a peace to know that no matter what happens, there is a higher power looking out for me.
You really don’t know what will happen next minute, or any amount of time later. Your present actions and what you have done earlier shape your future. Then how can you worry about something that changes continuously and you will never know about?
Rather you should make a complete status of what you have now. Using these details try to do good thing daily in a particular direction to secure a better and safe future.
Remember that there are others present in the world whose actions will also affect your future state.
I used to get quite anxious sometimes.
My solution was:
1. Plans (short-term and long term).
2. Make sure I am on point of the things that I have to finish.
3. As long as I finish them, I am fine.
Stop worrying. Be the best you can be in the present and your future self will thank you for it. Worry (don’t really) about what you are doing just now to make your future awesome.
TAKE CARE OF THE PRESENT FUTURE WILL AUTOMATICALLY TAKE CARE OF ITSELF.
What part of future are you worried about? Is it 6 years from today, or 6 days from today? Because then you should be worried all the time
- Don’t regret about your PAST
- Don’t be worried about your FUTURE.Just Live your Life in the MOMENT.